Ok now where did I leave off. Oh yeah. I moved out of the hell hole I lived in for a year with JS. And moved into a two bed one bath with a girl I met online. I really didn't know anyone so that was my last resort. I know I know... you are probably saying, "why didn't she just move home?" That's a good question. I think my answer to that is that I was still in love with JS and was scared to leave him behind. During this time I came upon a little website called Myspace. Little did I know what it had in store for me. Around the middle of March I met a guy on there, for his privacy sake I'm just going to call him BB. We hit it off right away. I'm talking a week later with this guy and we are already saying I love you to each other. WTF? Right? I know super fast. But I was in love. He was the best thing that ever happened to me. We did everything together. He was my everything. Skip ahead 2 years and 9 months later. I was just about to graduate college and he still lived at home with mom and dad. Still was in school with no end in sight and I still couldn't trust him after something that happened very early in our relationship. It just wasn't enough for me. I still loved him very much, but I had to break up with him. I wasn't happy anymore. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. To this day I miss him, but I know in my heart it was the right thing to do.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Monday, June 23, 2008
Seriously?
So, Saturday I went out to dinner with my friends Julie and Stephanie. We were having a lovely dinner when my cell starts ringing. I look at it and whose name should appear but my latest ex boyfriend M.
Now, I can't write this story without a little back story on me and M. M and I dated for almost three months from February to the end of April. He was basically a rebound I had from the three year relationship I had before him. (I'll get to that later in My Love Life- Part #2). M was everything I wanted at the time. A good looking guy with his own apartment and a really good job. He treated me like a queen... at first. Then I became the what every girl should not be. I was very dependent on him for my time and happiness. We spent almost every waking minute together and when we weren't together I was just waiting for his call. I did everything for him from playing stupid video games to cleaning his damn bathtub. For some reason I thought this was how I was going to keep him. Boy was I wrong. On our 3 month anniversary he dumped me. For five reasons.
1: I was too dependent on him
2: I was smothering him
3: He was only attracted to me sometimes (Yes that's right... He thought of me more like a sister... all I have to say is... EWWWWWWW)
4: I didn't make him want to do good things for me
5: I'm white! (I don't even want to go there. He gave this long drawn out explanation, that I really didn't follow. But my friends suggested suing for racial discrimination. Oh also important to mention... he was also white.)
Anyway, after all that and after I picked up the last of my stuff from his house he suggested, like the asshole he is, to not call him for a while. He didn't want to think that we were all friendly when we weren't. So, I didn't! And now he has emailed me once and called me twice.
Now we come to last Saturday. He left a message on my voicemail saying to call him back because he has to tell me something. I'm still not sure why but I decided to call him back. This is the rundown of our conversation.
Me: What's up? What do you have to tell me?
M: Justin (his roommate) is moving out.
Me: Why's that?
M: I'm dating his ex girlfriend. And he's pissed at me.
I can feel the heat start to rise inside of me.
Me: Oh, wow. That sucks.
M: blah blah blah, I really like her, blah blah blah, she's really great, blah blah blah, I've only felt like this about two other girls in my life (ie NOT YOU)
Me: Wow. That's good.
M: But she always breaks plans with me. I don't like that. BLAH BLAH BLAH
That was basically the conversation. All him talking. Me saying uh huh. I really should have hung up. I'm not sure why I didn't. He broke my heart and now he is coming to me for girl advice. YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME! Next time he's bored and calls me. I for one am NOT picking up the phone. I'm way to good for that.
Now, I can't write this story without a little back story on me and M. M and I dated for almost three months from February to the end of April. He was basically a rebound I had from the three year relationship I had before him. (I'll get to that later in My Love Life- Part #2). M was everything I wanted at the time. A good looking guy with his own apartment and a really good job. He treated me like a queen... at first. Then I became the what every girl should not be. I was very dependent on him for my time and happiness. We spent almost every waking minute together and when we weren't together I was just waiting for his call. I did everything for him from playing stupid video games to cleaning his damn bathtub. For some reason I thought this was how I was going to keep him. Boy was I wrong. On our 3 month anniversary he dumped me. For five reasons.
1: I was too dependent on him
2: I was smothering him
3: He was only attracted to me sometimes (Yes that's right... He thought of me more like a sister... all I have to say is... EWWWWWWW)
4: I didn't make him want to do good things for me
5: I'm white! (I don't even want to go there. He gave this long drawn out explanation, that I really didn't follow. But my friends suggested suing for racial discrimination. Oh also important to mention... he was also white.)
Anyway, after all that and after I picked up the last of my stuff from his house he suggested, like the asshole he is, to not call him for a while. He didn't want to think that we were all friendly when we weren't. So, I didn't! And now he has emailed me once and called me twice.
Now we come to last Saturday. He left a message on my voicemail saying to call him back because he has to tell me something. I'm still not sure why but I decided to call him back. This is the rundown of our conversation.
Me: What's up? What do you have to tell me?
M: Justin (his roommate) is moving out.
Me: Why's that?
M: I'm dating his ex girlfriend. And he's pissed at me.
I can feel the heat start to rise inside of me.
Me: Oh, wow. That sucks.
M: blah blah blah, I really like her, blah blah blah, she's really great, blah blah blah, I've only felt like this about two other girls in my life (ie NOT YOU)
Me: Wow. That's good.
M: But she always breaks plans with me. I don't like that. BLAH BLAH BLAH
That was basically the conversation. All him talking. Me saying uh huh. I really should have hung up. I'm not sure why I didn't. He broke my heart and now he is coming to me for girl advice. YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME! Next time he's bored and calls me. I for one am NOT picking up the phone. I'm way to good for that.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Happy Birthday to Me!
So today is my 24th Birthday! Happy Birthday to me! When I woke up this morning I forgot it was even my birthday. I think that is the first sign of getting older. Now I'm not saying that I'm old at all, although I have now entered my "mid- twenties." Dun Dun Duhhh.... impending doom! But I am beginning to feel more grown up. I now have a college degree, I can rent a car, drink alcohol legally (well I have been able to now for like three years), and I have a big group of grown up friends that do grown up things together. But, the funny thing is people still ask me, what do you want to do when you grow up? My question today is, when are you officially grown up? Is there a set age? Or when you have a "real" job? Or when you get married? I really don't know. Does anyone really grow up ever? I know a lot of older people that still act like a kid. Perhaps it's all relative.
Anyway, enough questions for one day. On Saturday my friends took me out for a fabulous birthday celebration to dinner and then dancing. What a great time! I have to say my friends rock! I totally felt loved when they brought out a huge cupcake cake! Total yummers! I now have about 12 cupcakes in my refrigerator. So if anyone wants so cupcakes you are more than welcome to come over and have some.
Here are some pics from Saturday night!
Anyway, enough questions for one day. On Saturday my friends took me out for a fabulous birthday celebration to dinner and then dancing. What a great time! I have to say my friends rock! I totally felt loved when they brought out a huge cupcake cake! Total yummers! I now have about 12 cupcakes in my refrigerator. So if anyone wants so cupcakes you are more than welcome to come over and have some.
Here are some pics from Saturday night!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
My love life (Part #1)
Where oh where do I start?
Well I guess I will start at the beginning. The beginning will be my freshman year in college. I decided to go to the University of Nebraska- Lincoln. (I am originally from Omaha, NE) That's where I met my first love... from now on he will be known as "JS." JS and I dated for a little over a year when we decided to move to San Antonio, where he was originally from. What I was thinking at the time... I have no idea. I don't think I was thinking actually. So, I moved 1000 miles south to Texas and moved in to a one bedroom apartment with him. Life was good for about 9 months until one day we were laying on the couch watching tv and he turns to me and says, "Becky. I want to break up." Yeah, I kinda flipped out. Threw things, screamed, pleaded and such. Come on! I thought I was going to marry this guy! But, it was over. The only problem was, we had 4 months on our apartment lease. Neither one of us could take it over and neither one of us wanted to break it. So, we stayed there... together... but broken up. I have to tell you, that was the WORST time in my life! Waking up in the middle of the night and not knowing where he was, was a horrible feeling i never want to feel again... ever! I still was in love with him, yet I knew he was sleeping around. UGH! I think the worst was the night he brought a girl over to MY HOUSE when I was sleeping, or trying to sleep. I didn't sleep at all that night. It was awful. Finally in January I moved out of that hell hole. And soon after that... I was healed! I no longer was in love with JS. I have no regrets with him. I learned a whole lot. I will not move in with someone until I know for a fact that it will be permanent. And most importantly not move 1000 miles away for a man until there is big fat rock on my
finger.
PS: Last time I saw JS was in my apartment complex over two years ago... I think he was buying weed. What a f**king loser!
This is what I looked like back then ------>
Innocent right?
Well I guess I will start at the beginning. The beginning will be my freshman year in college. I decided to go to the University of Nebraska- Lincoln. (I am originally from Omaha, NE) That's where I met my first love... from now on he will be known as "JS." JS and I dated for a little over a year when we decided to move to San Antonio, where he was originally from. What I was thinking at the time... I have no idea. I don't think I was thinking actually. So, I moved 1000 miles south to Texas and moved in to a one bedroom apartment with him. Life was good for about 9 months until one day we were laying on the couch watching tv and he turns to me and says, "Becky. I want to break up." Yeah, I kinda flipped out. Threw things, screamed, pleaded and such. Come on! I thought I was going to marry this guy! But, it was over. The only problem was, we had 4 months on our apartment lease. Neither one of us could take it over and neither one of us wanted to break it. So, we stayed there... together... but broken up. I have to tell you, that was the WORST time in my life! Waking up in the middle of the night and not knowing where he was, was a horrible feeling i never want to feel again... ever! I still was in love with him, yet I knew he was sleeping around. UGH! I think the worst was the night he brought a girl over to MY HOUSE when I was sleeping, or trying to sleep. I didn't sleep at all that night. It was awful. Finally in January I moved out of that hell hole. And soon after that... I was healed! I no longer was in love with JS. I have no regrets with him. I learned a whole lot. I will not move in with someone until I know for a fact that it will be permanent. And most importantly not move 1000 miles away for a man until there is big fat rock on my
finger. PS: Last time I saw JS was in my apartment complex over two years ago... I think he was buying weed. What a f**king loser!
This is what I looked like back then ------>
Innocent right?
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
My first blog!
Ok... so I have always been sort of a follower. I have 4 friends that have had their own blogs for months and now... I want one too! So, here it is!
My name is Becky and this is what I look like...
I'm 23... well I will be 24 in a week! I just graduated from college a month ago... a month ago today actually!
I have so much going on in my life right now that I wish I had started this blog a lot longer ago.
Right now I am working at a daycare.... same place I have been working for the past 4 years. It's not what I want to do with the rest of my life at all... but they are flexible, I love kids, and I get every weekend off. So, until I find a real job... it will have to do. Plus the kids and most of the time my coworkers make for some hilarious stories to tell.
Much more to come... I haven't even mentioned my love life.
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