Quarter of life crisis and other worries

Everyone has heard of a mid-life crisis right? Well, that's nothing compared to my quarter of life crisis that I'm going through right now.

The big question is... WHAT THE F*CK am I going to do now??? Ok, so I have a college degree. Right now it seems as useless as a plastic bag caught in an updraft. (Yes, I know that is an American Beauty reference. I'm a film snob remember?) Anyway, every job I find requires 10- 15 years of experience or it's an entry level sales job which I DO NOT want!

Which has led me to several conclusions...

1) I would rather be poor and live in a box than have a sales job.
2) The job market really sucks right now.
3) The only time I am truely happy is if I am doing something that involves film making.
4) I have nothing holding me or keeping me in San Antonio anymore.

These several conclusions has lead me to another conclusion. Where is the one place in the US that is known for movies and finding your dream? HOLLYWOOD, CA! Well, I'm not entirely stupid. I'm not just going to pack my bags and hop on a plane to LA tomorrow or something. But, I'm seriously thinking about moving there.

So... I decided I should probably talk to my Uncle, who has been an actor out there for a good 30 years. Which I did tonight. Now I do have to say, I thought he would have all these amazing connections. But, when we spoke tonight he told me straight up that, while he does know a lot of people it still may be hard to find me a job. He did on the other hand say that he and my aunt would do ANYTHING they could to help me. Which really meant a lot to me. He also had some very wise words for me. Hollywood is a brutal place. He said you have to truely "have a fire in your belly" for you to become successful in that town. You have to grow another layer of thick skin, because rejection is a daily occurrence.

The question of the hour is what to do for now? Well, I definitely need to be making more money. While my car is fixed, it's still very old and it may not last much longer. Starting in November I will have to begin paying back my student loans as well as paying back my Mom all the money that she lent me while I was in school, which is actually more than I owe the government.

Anyway, this is kinda the mindset I am in right now.


What else... oh yeah! I asked The Guitar Hero to go with me to Molly's wedding. He agreed. Only if he could wear his chucks. LOL! Absolutely. :-) Now, while I am excited about this I am kind of nervous about it too. We've only been on two dates. So, I don't know them him THAT well. Plus I will be introducing him to everyone. So, guys... please be nice to him. Thanks! Also, BB will be there. Ugh... I hope he acts appropriately. Not a pretty sight when he drinks. He better not say anything. This is Molly and Phillips day... and nothing else should matter. I'm getting my hair done and I have a new dress. I can't wait to get all pretty :-)

That should be it for tonight.

Peace to all!