Self Reflection

1. Blue is my favorite color
2. I will admit that I have a nice smile... my mom paid good money for it to get that way too.
3. I have no regrets in life... yes I've made mistakes but I do not regret any of them.
4. I am a horrible speller.
5. There are some commercials that have brought tears to my eyes.
6. I am very sensitive but I have gotten much better in the last couple of years.
7. I can't believe it's going on 7 years that I have been out of high school.
8. The only time I have ever colored my hair was when I was 14 and I thought it would be a good idea to dye it fire engine red.
9. I like to make people happy.
10. Ive been told that I have a huge heart and sometimes I care too much.
11. I miss my family so much sometimes that it hurts.
12. Autumn is my favorite season. Especially in the Midwest.
13. If I could have any car in the world it would be a 69 Mustang and of course it would be blue.
14. I have a really deep passion for film making and one day my biggest dreams will come true.
15. Humor is really important to me in a relationship.
16. I am a really fun drunk.
17. I have a bachelors degree.
18. My radio voice is different then my regular voice
19. There is something about strapping a guitar around a guy that makes them extremely hot.
20. Back to the Future has to be hands down one of the best movies ever.
21. I will admit that I am a film snob.
22. I am deathly afraid of needles, snakes, and heights.
23. I would be happy living in a box if I had only a camera.
24. Sometimes I wish I would get a letter saying that I was really a witch and that I would be attending Hogwarts. My letter just got lost in the mail for 12 years.
25. The Beatles are the best band that has ever lived. And no one could convince me otherwise. I will not listen.
26. I am pro choice.
27. Sometimes I think that I was born way to late. I should have been born in like 1950.
28. I think British accents are SO hot!
29. I like to sneeze.
30. My niece is the cutest thing ever to grace the Earth and no I am not partial at all!
31. I recently discovered my old diary from middle school and high school... lets just say it was an interesting read.
32. My brother is a freaking rocket scientist... yes a real one! How did he get so smart. To me his is still stupidhead.
33. Sometimes I wish I was 5 again. That was a good age. No real worries.
34. I like that I am a Gemini... Geminis totally rock!
35. My favorite place to be is in my bed.
36. My Mom's house still looks exactly the same as it did 10 years ago... and I really have no problem with that.
    
37. No matter how long that I have been away from there to me it is still home.
38. I have always been pretty independent but right now I am the most independent that I have ever been.
39. My first thought in the morning when I wake up is, coffee... I need coffee.
40. It really seems that everyone I know is getting married. Is this a sign that I am getting old?
41. I have realized recently that I only have truly LOVED two men in my life.
    
42. When I was in school I thought that I would never be done. Now that I am done I want to go back.
43. I have come to the conclusion that having a college degree is totally overrated.
44. I wish I could have known my Grandparents better.
45. My one surviving Grandfather is 91!
46. I had a Great Uncle who was killed at Pearl Harbor. He was only 18.
47. Halloween is one of my favorite holidays.
48. When I was little my Dad used to sing me to sleep. Those are some of my happiest memories.
49. Sometimes when I'm laying in bed going to sleep I create stories in my head but for some reason they look a lot like movies.
50. I think I am a minimalist.
51. Sometimes I wish I had a pet then I realize that I am not responsible enough yet for that.
52. When I was little my friends used to call me mom because I always was trying to take care of everyone and make sure that they were ok.
53. I have a lot of cousins but I never get to see them.
54. I relate times in my life to certain songs or albums.
55. I think I always have a song in my head even when I am sleeping.
56. I wonder sometimes if I will ever get married.
57. I want to eventually someday.
58. My parents made me who I am to today, and I am proud of that. I can only hope I can be half as good as them.
59. Ask me anything about Seinfeld and I can tell you the correct answer.
60. I cant believe that I moved 1000 miles away from home for a stupid boy. I wonder where I would be now if I didn't move?
61. 2008 sucked... I really hope 2009 will be better.
62. I was never so proud of myself as when I lost over 20 pounds.
63. I am a severely indecisive person.
64. I have a friend in the Marines that is going to Afghanistan soon and I am really afraid for him.
65. I fall easily for tall guys with cute smiles.
66. Some of the best people watching is at the airport.
67. Edward Cullen is the epitome of the perfect man.
68. I rather go out of my way then make a difficult left turn.
69. Smoking cigarettes is the most disgusting habits ever.
70. I should be making way more money than I am now.
71. I didn't pay much for my very expensive education. I was REALLY lucky.
72. I wish I had a Mac book.
73. My car is very basic. I am just happy it gets me where I need to be safely.
74. I miss dancing.
75. I LOVE musicals.
76. I think I could definitely make it in NYC.
77. I had some horrible friends when I was in middle school.
    
78. I have never seen Goonies or Boondock Saints... don't worry they are both on my Netflix queue.
79. My favorite Christmas tradition is going our for breakfast on Christmas Eve with my Dad.
80. I am so proud of my Mom for everything she has been through in her life. She is a true survivor.
81. I am the cheapest date in the world. It doesn't take much to get me over the edge.
82. I text more than I talk on my phone.
83. It scares me to think if I couldn't text anymore.
84. Sex and the City is one of the best shows ever!
85. Books are an escape into a different world.
86. I think about "the one who got away" at least once a day, if not more.
87. I was 0.1 away from graduating with honors.
88. I tried acting once and actually I wasn't half bad.
89. I love Christmas lights and fireworks. They make me happy.
90. My Dad's cooking is the best in the world.
91. I cuss like a sailor... I've tried to stop but it's really hard.
92. I wish I had a DSLR.
93. Are people with money more happy?
94. I used to love Bert and Ernie. They were so silly.
95. Sleeping and eating are my favorite past times.
96. One time I actually drove threw a rainbow... I am totally serious.
97. I have my baby names already picked out.
98. When I play Guitar Hero I pretend like I am a real rock star.
99. I still sleep with a teddy bear.
100. My favorite book of all time is Catcher in the Rye by JD Salinger.
     

15 more minutes of Christmas

So as I write this there is about 15 more minutes left of Christmas. All in all had a wonderful day. I am spending my Christmas vacation with my Dad in the Windy City. I don't even want to think about how cold it is outside now. Probably in the single digits. Burrrr!

Anyway, another Christmas has come and gone. It seems like just yesterday that it was June 25th and Christmas was another 6 months away. It seems like just yesterday. But I had a fantastic day. My Dad let me sleep in until 10. It felt so nice. That was probably my first gift of the day. After I finally decided to get up I sat down for a while, drank some coffee and watched the wind blow the snow all around. It was a very peaceful morning. I made out with some wonderful Christmas gifts too. My Dad got me the perfume I had asked for, a really cool charm bracelet, and a very stylish weekender bag with some cute pjs inside. (Pictures to come) It's funny, as I get older I realize that Christmas isn't really about the presents it is about spending time with your family and the people you care most about. After all the family finally left tonight my Dad and I sat down to do what we do every year and watch A Christmas Story together. He is the only one that doesn't care if I quote the movie word for word, because he does it too! That was the highlight of my day. I LOVE that movie and but I LOVE watching it with him even more.

I hope everyone had a wonderful day and you got to spend it with the people that you love the most. Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.

I'm so excited!

So... recently I have been working a lot with this production company here in town. Parker Creek Productions. I worked with them for their latest film "No Soliciting" and it was so much fun. They are super nice people and really great at what they do. On Sunday I got an email from them asking me if I would like to be an official part of their production company! And I accepted. Of course there is no pay but, the experience I will get from working with them will be worth more than any money I could get. Plus there is already another project in the works. I'll keep you updated.

Friday is our wrap party for "No Soliciting." That should be pretty fun. I'm bringing the Guitar Hero. (Yes I know I haven't mentioned him in a really long time.) But we are still friends. He's a good friend actually. We have a lot in common and he remembers things that I say, which to me is super important. I could see us being in a relationship but, I think neither of us wants to be in one right now.

Now on to more important things... like what I want for Christmas.

1. Plaid Converse Chuck Taylors... I LOVE these shoes!
2. Guess Perfume... I finally ran out of this after two years! I love this stuff. Smells so good!
   

3. Persuasion by Jane Austin... I've always wanted to read this.

Off to bed. Oh before I forget.

So....

Remember BB? My ex boyfriend. Well the other day I was sitting at job #1 and I realized that it had been one year since I broke up with him. I really can't believe it! Where has this year gone? I really have no idea. What have I accomplished? Well I did get my bachelor's degree. I suppose that is an accomplishment. But seriously, I think that it's totally overrated. (Just my opinion). But here is a picture to prove that I did it anyway. Anywho... back to BB. I haven't talked to him in a really long time. My friends are going to kill me when they read this but sometimes I miss him. Most of the time he was pretty good to me... most of them time. Maybe I don't really miss him, maybe I just miss being in a relationship. I haven't been single for this long since high school. On the other hand, I kinda like it. Relationships take a lot of work. Not something I really have a lot of time for. I mean I seriously don't have time to even do laundry let alone maintain a healthy relationship. So, it's probably a good idea that I'm single.

Besides working two jobs and sleeping, this is what I have been up to lately/

• I saw the Twilight movie. Good... but not great. Book was, of course, better. But the soundtrack is A-MAZE-ING!!! Super good!
• Working on a new short film with a small production company here in town. The move is called No Soliciting. It should turn out really well. Here are some pics from the shoot. I love this group of people. They are super talented and love making movies. They also love to collaborate with other people. And always willing to hear others idea.
  

• I sat down with them on Wednesday and we are currently working on a new story idea. I'm really excited about this one because I get to write part of the script! Whoop Whoop! FYI: writing a screenplay or even dialogue is hard! It's not like writing a story it's totally different. I'm reading Story by Robert McKee the Screenplay writing Guru to get some advice.
• Another album I am obsessed with right now is Snow Patrol's new album called A Hundred Million Suns. You thought their last album was good. Wait till you hear this one!

Well... that's about it. Hope everyone is having a wonderful weekend. Also... my BFF was in a bad car accident last week. I wish I could have been in the same state to help her out. I know she is feeling lonely. Love you!!

two weeks until Christmas.....

I finally put my tree up! It's just a little tabletop one that I have had for three years but it looks great! Pictures to come...

Still missing my Stephanie. Love you girl :-)


(Gotta love Halloween!)

Ugh...

I have to work in 8 hours... I think Black Friday should be illegal. I suppose it could be worse, I could have to be at work in like 4 hours. And because I'm WAY too nice... I'm baking a cake at 1:00 in the morning. I totally forgot I said I would do that. Oh well....

Because I am also a sheep.... here are some things that I am thankful for on this day, well I guess yesterday technically, that I am thankful for.

1. My parents... you taught me everything I know and value.

2. My brother... because we have the same sneeze, laugh crazy loud in the movie theater, and being a great Daddy!

3. My job(s)... even though I may hate them I am glad that I have them.

4. My health... although my face is waging war against me right now.

5. My friends... no matter what has happened in the past, is happening right now, or may happen in the future, you are still THE BEST!

6. My hair... it truely is my best asset.

7. My education... I would not trade it for anything in the world... I am truely blessed to have it.

8. Music... it seems to calm even the savage beast.

9. My car... I dont care if it doesnt have any bells or whistles... it runs... thats really all I care about.

10. My country... to be able to live free and make my own decisions is truely something to be thankful for.

I hope everyone had a good and restful Thanksgiving. Pictures of my homemade cherry pie to come. Well my cake is done now... I'm going to sleep.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Lots to write about but I don't have to time right now! I gotta get ready for Turkey Day! Thanks to my friend Erin and her family for taking me in today! I can't wait to eat some good food!

Also, here is my weekly post.... Miss you Stephy. On this day most of all.

OMG!!

So as you all know I am a little obsessed with the latest book craze Twilight. As you probably also know the movie for the first book came out this past Friday. While it wasn't anywhere near as good as the book they still did a pretty good job. Now, I really pictured Edward, the main character in the book, quite differently then the actor they chose for the movie but as it turns out I really could care less. The actor they chose, Robert Pattinson, is absolutely one of the most gorgeous guys I have ever seen. I mean seriously look...


My boss and I have been drooling over him all morning. I asked her earlier today... "How come guys don't look like that here?" She was like I have no idea! Maybe because he is British. Who knows... but for know he will stay as my desktop background.

Cali is too far away...

I miss you Stephanie... and like I told you... I plan to post a picture a week until you get back. Hopefully I won't run out. And if I do, I'll just start over.

Dorkgasam

I can not wait.... I haven't been this excited since last summer when the final book came out!!!

Also...

I miss my best friend...



:-(

All my life...

...I had sort of a plan as to what I was going to do next. After Kindergarten comes first grade, then second, third and so forth. Junior high is after elementary then high school then of course college. I spent 6 years of college just to graduate. Then as of last May I stood in line at graduation with my cap and gown and I graduated. I had earned my college degree. This is what I had spent my whole entire life working for. Ok... so now what? Alright... get a job. Easier said then done. I had absolutely no idea how hard this was going to be. If I would have imagined my life 6 months after graduating from college it would not have been this. I'm f---ing broke. Not only did I have to get a roommate because I couldn't afford to live on my own but as of last weekend I had to get a second job. Yes, Becky will be working retail. I have not worked retail since high school. And yes I will be working Black Friday. Dear Lord I am not looking forward to that day. On one hand I am in a really rough place in my life right now but on the other I know I should feel grateful that I even have one job. I know there are a lot of people that don't even have one job right now. But damnit! That shouldn't be me. I have a degree from a good university with stellar grades. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?!! Am I not trying hard enough? Am I not looking in the right places? I've become so frustrated with myself. I feel so completely lost. I feel like I have lost direction in my life. And it is SO not a very good feeling.

Change...

It's a word that we having been hearing a lot lately. Our country has a lot change coming its way. But so do I.

One major change for me is that my best friend Stephanie left yesterday for California. She will be there for about 5 months. (She got a temporary job there for the winter.) While I am very happy for her for this great opportunity I can't help but feel a little bit selfish.... I'm going to miss her... A LOT. It really didn't hit me that she was leaving until this past Monday when I said goodbye to her. I gave her a great big hug said "see you in April" and got into my car, drove away and started to cry. I guess I didn't realize until then what a big part of my life she is. I mean I always know that she is... it just really struck me at that moment. I know it's just 5 months and she will be back but still... that's almost half a year. But on the other hand I am so proud of her. She got this great opportunity to do this job and instead of saying "no, I can't leave my boyfriend and my friends for 5 months," she said of course! She is a very strong person that realizes a great opportunity when she sees it. Maybe that's why she is such a good friend, because I look up to her. She is confident in who she is and what she wants to do with her life. She trusts herself enough to move away from everything she knows for half a year to do something that she loves. That is the person I long to be. As for now I'm working on it.

Ok enough tears...

I've come to a rest with my dating. At least for a while. I have gone on about 4 first dates in the past couple of months and all of them have been pretty disappointing. The last one was a complete waste of time except for the free movie and dinner.

1. He answered his phone during the movie... that's a cardinal sin in my book... then left the theater for almost ten minutes to talk. THEN had the nerve to ask me when he got back, "So, what happened?" I said, "You're kidding right?"
2. We went to Johnny Carinos for dinner and he says to me,"I don't normally go to fancy places like this." It took every fiber in my being to not fall off my chair laughing. I wonder what he thinks is a non fancy restaurant... Whataburger?
   
3. He wore his baseball hat during dinner. Ok while Johnny Carinos isn't a "fancy" restaurant as he claimed it was, at least take your hat off during dinner. Didn't your mother teach you better manners?

Lets hope some change will come to my life soon. I so desperately need it.

Election Day!!

Just a reminder to go out and vote today. Do your duty as an American and vote. Should be very interesting tonight. For me I will be glued to my couch watching the election results.

Gotta love this!

Has anyone else seen this? I was crying I was laughing so hard when I saw this!

You're not going to believe this!

Ok... so Saturday Stephanie, Molly, and a couple other friends and I went to go see Chicago (the musical) at one of the local theaters here in town. It was great! And it was only $20. We had a really good time. Except for one thing. During intermission I was in line for the women's restroom, and it was a pretty long line. I was chatting with this nice woman behind me (her son was in the show) When this older lady, maybe in her 50's 60's, comes out of the restroom exclaiming how long the line was. Looks at me and says...

Lady: wow this line is really long. They should really let the pregnant ladies go first (points to me)
Me: my mouth hanging open... the blood is slowly rising to my face
She walks away... but then comes back
Me: Did you just call me pregnant?
Lady: Looks at me like a deer in the headlights and walks away.

Just FYI... I wasn't just a little bit miffed... I was full fledged PISSED OFF! A woman does not just say that to another woman unless she is about to pop. Ok, yes I was wearing an umpire waist shirt but I don't think I looked in the least bit pregnant! My friends were very comforting. Saying things along the lines of "You do NOT look pregnant Becky." And "That lady was stupid Becky, F*ck her." and "You look stylish and beautiful. She's just jealous." Just goes to show you that I have great friends. Love you guys :-)

Yes I am alive...

unbeknowinst to you all. I just haven't felt like blogging in a while. I am finally all moved into my new place. I love it! It's huge... well I guess anything is huge compared to my old place. Also, so far so good on the roommate situation. She is really down to earth and sweet. We get along great! I kinda like having someone around once in a while you know...

Lets see what else... I still hate my job. But I figured nothing is going to change unless I make it change. So I am applying for anything and everything! I have just been going on to monster and craigslist and applying for whatever I see that looks slightly interesting. I have also come to the conclusion that I may need a second job in the mean time. All of my savings are gone. And I WILL NOT go into credit card debt. So... I'm not sure what kind of job yet but something to give me a little bit more money.

I finally figured out what I am going to be for Halloween! But it is a surprise! So you will just have to wait and see until I post pictures. It is pretty original so I am sure no one else will have it at any of the parties that I will be attending.

In other news my uncle (the actor) is shooting a movie with my favorite directors right now. The Coen Brothers! When I heard this I almost fainted I was so excited! Maybe he could get me an autograph or something! I would just die. If you haven't seen No Country for Old Men then you need to go rent it right now! It was one of the best movies of last year.

Nothing really new in the guy department. I have been on a couple "eh" dates but nothing that gave me fireworks yet. We shall see. I kinda like not having to worry about a guy. It really gives me time to concentrate on myself.

Bits and Pieces

Well lets see... what has been going on....

I finished Twilight yesterday. It was SO good! I definitely recommend it. I started the next book, New Moon. I heard it's not as good as the first but hardly anything ever is. I'll let you know what it's like as I get going.

What else? What else?

Oh it was Stephanie's birthday celebration this Saturday. Her real B-Day is on Tuesday. We had a great time! We started off the night at Houlihan's for dinner than on to a local bar. We played a million games of pool. I didn't do too bad. I'm getting better. The past couple of guys that I have dated were so determined to teach me that I actually picked up a couple things. I wasn't feeling too well near the end of the night so I went home.

I think she is realizing how old she is...

Pretty ladies


She looks so happy :-)


Which is a segue into my next story...

As I was laying down, I got a text for my friend that I work with. It wouldn't have been unusual but it was almost 2 o'clock in the morning. I read it and it says, "Your new apartment is on fire. Burning up." I was like WHAT??!!! She calls me and tell she is across the street at her apartment complex and there is like 10 fire trucks outside of the apartments that I'm going to be moving into in a couple of weeks and one of the buildings is on fire. So I get some clothes on and drive over there... its like 3 minutes away from where I live now... and boy was she right. One of the apartment buildings in the complex was completely on fire. As I stand there watching it I figure out that the building that is on fire is not anywhere near the one that we will be moving into. Thank God! It was really scary though. There were people running around and fire fighters all over the place. I drove by this morning to look at the building in the daylight. The top apartments where it started I guess, was completely destroyed. I'm just glad it didn't happen when I was living there.

So all this fire stuff really made me think. If there was a fire in my house and I had only a couple of minutes to get out... what would I take? And this is what I came up with...

1. My stuffed care bear... I've had it since I was a baby and really means a lot to me
2. My external hard drive... it has all my pictures and all of my music on it
   
3. My camera
4. and the locket my Grandma gave me

If your house were burning down... what would you take?

new car pictures... finally

Here is my beautiful new car! Sorry it took so long for me to post, but here it is! I've been trying to think of a name for it. And I haven't come up with anything cool yet. It's definitely a her. If you have any ideas... let me know!

My new addiction

Thanks to some friends at work I have found a new addiction. While no book could ever take the place of my first love...


Twilight has settled my longing for something irresistible that I can not put down. I long for the work day to be over so I can read. I light my cider scented candle and prop my self up on my couch for a good read. Stephanie Meyer has taken everyone's perfect man and made him come alive on the pages of her first novel. With one big exception... he's kinda a vampire. Now I sound like a book critic or something. Anyway... I had to take a quick break from the book to share with you all how great it is.

oh perfect job.... where art thou?

So it has been 4 months and 12 days since they played pomp and circumstance and I so proudly held my head up high and marched across the stage and received my oh so elite Bachelor of Arts diploma. My question now is.... oh perfect job... where art thou? Actually let me rephrase that last statement. Oh job... any job... where art thou?

This question formed in my head today while I was at my current position. Am I really cleaning up after children? Really? With my thousands of dollars education? REALLY? I'm so frustrated right now. I shouldn't have to do this anymore. Why did I go to school? Please someone give me some motivation quick!

I did send my cover letter and resume to this one ad agency that had posted a job opening last week. This job would be so perfect! I would have 18 paid holidays a year! Full health insurance and a 401K! Please everyone pray for me.

NEW CAR!

So you won't hear me bitching about my car ever again... hopefully. Because last Thursday night I bought a new car. Well technically it's not new new, but new to me. It's a 06 Mitsubishi Lancer. It's blue and beautiful! Is it possible to be in love with a car? I think so. It doesn't make weird sounds. I'm not afraid to drive it! It's wonderful. And the payments are really reasonable too. I can definitely afford it.

The buying experience was really strange. Strange in a good way I guess. As you know I have been looking for a new car for a while. Almost all summer. I had been looking online everyday to see if I could find a good deal. Well, I kept going back to the Lancer. It was a good price, low miles, seemed to look ok, so I decided to just go and test drive it on Thursday. Next thing I know I'm sitting in the financing office signing documents. Now this may not sound strange to anyone else but I was strange for me. Yes, I have been living on my own for almost 5 years... but I have always felt the need to ask my Mom's permission before I made big decisions. As I was sitting in the dealership I just kept thinking to myself... "Oh What's Mom going to think?" "She's going to say that I can't afford this or something." "I should really call her and ask her if it's ok." But then it dawned on me. I'm 24 years old. I have a college degree. I have my own apartment. I have a job (not a good one) but a job. I pay my bills. I don't need to ask her if it's ok. I'm pretty sure I'm a big girl now. I'm buying this f---ing car! And I did. And you know what... she told me how proud she was of me. Doing this all on my own. Taking care of everything. She was almost crying on the phone. I'm proud of myself too.

I know I've asked this question before. But how do you know when you are an adult? These are some of the ways that I have figured out so far...

1. When you meet a guy out somewhere you look to see if he is wearing a wedding ring.
2. You go to more weddings in a year then birthday parties.
3. Your friends from high school are having babies.
4. You get a $50,000 life insurance policy (yes I did that yesterday... what? it was as good deal)

That's all I can think of right now. I'm sure there is more. Let me know if you think of anything else.

BTW... pictures of the Lancer coming soon... I promise.

I opened up the windows today...

FINALLY! I was so excited when I woke up today. It was in the low 70's this morning! It was a breath of fresh air! If you know south Texas you know how long it stays hot in the summer. I agree with Julie... I cant wait for long sleeves, boots, and scarves. And comfort food. My Mom makes this awesome pumpkin soup. As soon as I get the recipe from her I'm going to post it! It's amazing! This weather also makes me miss the Midwestern fall. The leaves changing, and there is this smell in the air that lets you know that autumn has arrived. I totally miss that! This time of year always makes me super homesick. *Sigh*

I'm not old but my body is telling me I am...

Things that should not be happening at 24 years of age, but are...

1. I seriously think I found a grey hair the other day
2. While sitting at my computer lately I have been getting a headache, I finally realized that it was from squinting... I think I may need reading glasses.
3. I banged my leg at my desk at work and the next day I have a bruise the size of Texas on my leg

I still haven't found a job yet. I went to the Spurs Career Fair yesterday with Julie's K. He just graduated from college in May also. The thing was kinda a joke. There were about 10 companies there, all sports related. Some of the big name sports entertainment companies from the surrounding areas were there. They weren't doing any on site interviewing, just taking resumes. All they told us were jobs that were available and to go online and apply for them. Ok I just did not wait almost an hour standing in line (with heels mind you) for you to tell me that! The only cool thing about it was afterward they had a post mixer with dollar beers. Nothing like trying to network with other jobless people while drinking your 1$ Coors Lite. I also for some reason found it necessary to try and flirt with the good looking boys in business suites. (Any chance I get right?) My goodness I'm becoming one of those... EKKK!

Oh well. But today Sarah calls me to tell me of this awesome position that she found online that would be perfect for me! And it's not sales! So I spent a couple of hours this afternoon working on my cover letter and perfecting my resume. Thanks Mom for the awesome advice. I love my Momma, she's SO smart! It was just posted on Friday so please everyone send good vibes my way. I hope to hear back from them soon.

As for the boys in my life... The guitar hero and I have become quite good friends. We talk almost everyday and he is super fun to hang out with. Although he is 4 years older than me we are pretty much in the same boat, except he doesn't have his degree. We are both pretty up in the air as to what we want to do with our lives. He really wants to move too but doesn't know exactly where he wants to go. All he knows is that he doesn't want to stay here. Me either.

As far as the bartender goes, I'm pretty sure he hates me. But I really don't blame him all that much. Last Thursday, some friends and I from work went to the bar where he works. When we got there he told me to put "whatever I wanted on his tab." Ok... so I did. But for some unknown reason, even at this point in time, I told my friends to do the same. Perhaps I was thinking he wouldn't mind. I dunno. I proceeded to get very drunk. And when I start drinking a lot I get pretty friendly. You know what they say... liquid courage. So, I start flirting with the lead singer of the band that was playing, you know while still putting drinks on the bartenders tab. WTF was I thinking? I don't think I was, that's the whole point. I woke up the next day feeling like s*#@, not just because I had a horrible hangover but for what I did. I usually don't do things like that. I'm always pretty nice and considerate of others feelings. So, I texted him many times telling him how sorry I was and offering to pay him back. Yup... no response. I figured as much. Well, last night we went to the bar and I saw him.

Me: Hey ----. How's it going?
Him: Good.
Gives me this sort of akward half hug.
Me: Did you get any of my texts?
Him: Yeah. Some of them.
Me: Well... I'm...
He turns and walks away. I'm standing there looking like a complete idiot.

I'm done with him. It was a pretty f---ed thing I did. But I apologized, offered to repay him. There is nothing else I can do now.

Anyway. That's the latest on my life.... always entertaing. It's almost time for The Simpsons.

Fianlly....

Ok so I did not fall off the face of the Earth. Although you might have thought that since I haven't written in a while.

Let see... what has happened these past couple of weeks.

The Job Front

Still no job to speak of. I'm still desperately looking. Lately I have just been feeling very underpaid and under appreciated. Did I seriously go to school for 6 years and pay God knows how much money to be writing signs that say "No Peanut Products are allowed at this childcare facility." I DO NOT think so! If I told you what I got paid I think most of you would faint. It is barely enough to get by. That reminds me that since I am now officially cut off from my Mom, I am getting an apartment with one of my friends. She is really cool and we get along great! I'm super excited, especially for the part where we get to split all the bills in half. I will be saving like $150 on rent alone. Praise Jebus! We move in the first week in October. Anyway back to the job hunt. For some unknown reason, I was talking to BB a couple of weeks ago on AIM and he asked me how the job hunt was going. Our conversation is as follows...

BB: How is the job hunt going?
Me: Terrible, haven't found anything yet.
BB: Well, have you thought about what you want to do?
Me: Oh no! I haven't at all! (sarcasam implied) Of course I have. It's not really a matter of that anymore. I just need a job at this point... almost anything that pays me more than I'm getting now.
BB: Well, where have you been looking?
Me: Everywhere!
BB: Have you tried monster.com or careerbuilder.com
(This is the part where I almost through my computer out of the window I was so pissed off)
Me: No "BB" I haven't tried that at all! What a good f-ing idea! It's not like I have been out of school for almost 4 months or anything and haven't tried that new fangled invention called the internet!

I was SO mad! That was the dumbest thing he has ever asked me. I know deep down inside he was trying to help, but it just really pissed me off to no end. Maybe it was just the boiling point. Because everyone and their mom has been asking me the same question all summer, "So Becky, What are you going to do now." I just want to scream at them I DONT KNOW! LEAVE ME ALONE! I have a career fair in a couple of weeks. I'm hoping that will be helpful.

The Guitar Hero and Others

So, nothing really major with the guitar hero lately. We talk almost everyday either on AIM or text (he's not really of a phone convo type of guy) But he keeps calling me his friend. At first I was a little upset but then realized that it was ok. I kinda think of him like that anyway. Besides I don't think I could be in a real relationship with him right now. Plus, he told me a while back that he wasn't looking to get into a relationship right now anyway. And another thing. He doesn't have a car. Which is totally cool. But, I'm kinda tired of picking him up and driving him everywhere we go, espcially since my car has been acting funny. The other day when I was taking him home he goes to me, "can you swing by Little Cesar's real quick? I wanna get some food." I was all like ok. I didn't really mind but it kinda bugged me a little bit. And he didn't even offer to give me money for gas. So, fine we'll just be friends.

I have also been out witht this other guy a couple times, his nickname will be The Bartender. He's actually friends with another friend of mine. He gave me his number a couple weeks ago when I went to the bar where he works. I thought he was kinda cute so I agreed to go have dinner with him last weekend. We had a nice meal and a nice conversation. Until he throws out a couple big bombs on me

1. He smokes (Yuck! I H.A.T.E. cigarettes)
2. He really enjoys bartending and doesn't mind doing for a life long career
and finally...
3. He doesn't have a car! (WTF is with these guys not having cars! I'm so tired of driving my POS around picking up these guys for our dates. I'm not super traditional but seriosuly give me break!)

We went out again on Monday night. Went to dinner, a movie, and had a couple of drinks. Again, it was nice, but I'm really not attracted to him. The thing is... I know that he likes me. He told my friends that he did and I can tell when we hang out that he does. I feel bad that I don't feel the same about him, but I we have absolutely nothing in common. This always seems to happen. The ones I have no interest in are really into me and the ones that I'm really interest in have zero interest in me. Murphy's law I guess.

The Car

I hate my car! The belts keep squeaking, the transmission is f**ked, and my window won't roll down unless you push on it. My plan is to get a new used car after I move. I have done my budget a million times and I'm pretty sure I can afford a small car payment. Everyone pray for me that I will find a job soon so I won't have to worry about the car anymore! Thanks. I appreciate it!

All I did this weekend...

So my Dad got me the first season of Smallville for my birthday which was two months ago, and I decided to watch like 10 episodes of it this weekend. There wasn't much going on so that's how I decided to spend it.

First of all, this is one of the best shows ever! I watched like the first three seasons when they were on live but, stopped watching for one reason or another.

It's about superman before he became superman. When he was in high school. I'm a big dork I've always really like the Superman movies, tv shows (Lois and Clark... remember that?!) and comic books.

Second of all, my perfect man plays Clark Kent (Tom Welling). Just look...


Anyway, if you've never seen it... now is the time! They have 8 seasons right now. And they are all on Netflix. Go Now!

More mens

Seriously?

Come to Becky... come to Becky....

Go team USA!

An Ode to the Summer Olympics

I have been glued to my seat this entire weekend watching them. Although, I'm still in the prehistoric age with my rabbit eared antenna on my TV, NBC comes in kinda fuzzy, I still can't stop watching them.

These people have committed their life to their sport. Dedication, perseverance, extreme talent, and athleticism. Seeing their dreams become a reality is an amazing feeling.

I watched the medal ceremony in which Michael Phelps won the gold medal for swimming last night. You could see how proud of himself he was standing on the highest platform, with the national anthem playing. It was pure emotion. It was awesome!
So... here is to the Summer Olympics in Beijing! Go team USA!

Sidenote: These athletic men of our own swim team really makes the games more pleasurable to watch.


Ummm yeah....
Need I say more?

I'm so tired!

What a crazy weekend! It was fun... but very tiring. Yesterday I was so lethargic that I felt like I had been drugged or something.

Friday I got off work at noon because I felt really sick. So, I went home and slept for like 4 hours. It was great. In the evening The Guitar Hero and I went shopping for wedding clothes. He was actually really fun to shop with. He didn't mope around or drag his feet from place to place. He tried stuff on and was feeling material. I was quite impressed. At one point I think I called him a girl. He just kinda laughed it off. Then we got Pei Wei watched part of "Superbad," played some Guitar Hero (of course) and then went home. *Sidenote* I think I have some sort of addiction to that game. I'm always the one that suggests playing it. I guess I have always wanted to be a rock star or something.

Saturday was really crazy. I didn't sleep well for some reason so I was really tired. I went and weighed in at Weight Watchers and lost 0.8 lbs! Woohoo! I was really excited. A total of 4.4 lbs. Then I went to get my hair done. I showed the lady exactly what I wanted and an hour and whole can of hairspray later it was done! And gorgeous!

Not the best picture... but you get the idea.



Then I was off to the mall to get my free makeover. They lady did a number on me. She spent about 15 minutes alone on my eyes. But it turned out really cool!

The wedding was REALLY fun! They had gambling tables and a really good DJ. It was on a terrace that overlooked the downtown area. And to my great surprise the Guitar Hero could dance. Ok, not just slow dance mind you, but fast dance, swing, AND two step! I could have danced the whole night if I was given the chance. I also was the lucky one to catch the bouquet but unfortunately my forgetful self left it at the hotel. Oh well! All in all, it was a fabulous evening. Also, the whole event was taped for the reality show "Whose Wedding is it Anyway." So, look for me on tv around October. I'll keep you updated on when it will air.






Congratulations Molly and Phillip! Love you guys :-)

Quarter of life crisis and other worries

Everyone has heard of a mid-life crisis right? Well, that's nothing compared to my quarter of life crisis that I'm going through right now.

The big question is... WHAT THE F*CK am I going to do now??? Ok, so I have a college degree. Right now it seems as useless as a plastic bag caught in an updraft. (Yes, I know that is an American Beauty reference. I'm a film snob remember?) Anyway, every job I find requires 10- 15 years of experience or it's an entry level sales job which I DO NOT want!

Which has led me to several conclusions...

1) I would rather be poor and live in a box than have a sales job.
2) The job market really sucks right now.
3) The only time I am truely happy is if I am doing something that involves film making.
4) I have nothing holding me or keeping me in San Antonio anymore.

These several conclusions has lead me to another conclusion. Where is the one place in the US that is known for movies and finding your dream? HOLLYWOOD, CA! Well, I'm not entirely stupid. I'm not just going to pack my bags and hop on a plane to LA tomorrow or something. But, I'm seriously thinking about moving there.

So... I decided I should probably talk to my Uncle, who has been an actor out there for a good 30 years. Which I did tonight. Now I do have to say, I thought he would have all these amazing connections. But, when we spoke tonight he told me straight up that, while he does know a lot of people it still may be hard to find me a job. He did on the other hand say that he and my aunt would do ANYTHING they could to help me. Which really meant a lot to me. He also had some very wise words for me. Hollywood is a brutal place. He said you have to truely "have a fire in your belly" for you to become successful in that town. You have to grow another layer of thick skin, because rejection is a daily occurrence.

The question of the hour is what to do for now? Well, I definitely need to be making more money. While my car is fixed, it's still very old and it may not last much longer. Starting in November I will have to begin paying back my student loans as well as paying back my Mom all the money that she lent me while I was in school, which is actually more than I owe the government.

Anyway, this is kinda the mindset I am in right now.


What else... oh yeah! I asked The Guitar Hero to go with me to Molly's wedding. He agreed. Only if he could wear his chucks. LOL! Absolutely. :-) Now, while I am excited about this I am kind of nervous about it too. We've only been on two dates. So, I don't know them him THAT well. Plus I will be introducing him to everyone. So, guys... please be nice to him. Thanks! Also, BB will be there. Ugh... I hope he acts appropriately. Not a pretty sight when he drinks. He better not say anything. This is Molly and Phillips day... and nothing else should matter. I'm getting my hair done and I have a new dress. I can't wait to get all pretty :-)

That should be it for tonight.

Peace to all!

I forgot to post this video...

Molly was such a good bachelorette. She did everything she was asked. Even this...

Weekend Wrap- up

Friday

After work, my friend took me to pick up my car! Finally right? I was SO excited to see it. He even washed it and vacuumed it out for me! Thanks B!

Then I went home and cleaned my apartment because The Guitar Hero was going to come over later. He came over around 8:30 along with his XBox and you guessed it Guitar Hero! I think we ended up playing it for like two hours, then watched my favorite movie Back to the Future. I feel asleep for the most of it though. It was a great night in.

Saturday

I went to weight watchers in the morning. I lost 2.8 pounds this week! I have no idea how that happened! I tried to take a nap after that but I had too much to do get ready for the Bachelorette Party. We all caravaned up to Austin around 8. We made it there by 9. Checked into our hotel, and got ready to go out. We all wore a little black dress. Mourning the loss of Molly's singledom. We all looked very smoking hot!

This is what I like to call my before picture.

Molly dressed up in her Bachelorette gear!

Here is all of us in the elevator.

Erin and I while we waited for a cab.


This is my first free drink of the night at Pure. Looks pretty, right?

This is the awesome dance floor at Qua. There were sharks and sting rays swimming under us as we danced.

This is what I would like to call my after picture.



Sunday

First of all...

Sunday morning

Not so bad for having a hangover!

After eating breakfast at Trudy's... OMG! SO SO SO SO good! Steph and I went to IKEA. Ok it was my first time there... I went totally crazy. That place is so awesome! I have been looking for a new coffee table. And as soon as I walked in, I found the perfect one. Plus it was only $30!

Here's the addition to my home...





Now I'm going to go crash... only to wake up at 6:30 tomorrow! Ugh... my world keeps turning!

Catch-up

The Interview

I applied for a job that I found through Yahoo jobs. It said something like entry- level marketing/ promotions/ advertising jobs. So I sent them my resume. They emailed me back asking to call and schedule an interview, which I did for the following day.

I got the time off of work- no problem. I looked up the address and it is on the OTHER side of town... totally BFE. Ok, whatever. Maybe it will be with it. I leave an hour early, because I wasn't sure where exactly it was. When I arrived at the address I had was all ready to be craning my head upwards to look for an office building and what did I find... a glass, shady looking strip mall, conveniently located next door to a plumbing supply store.

I go in to a room about the size of someone's kitchen and there is a young woman sitting at a glass desk, probably purchased at Wal- mart, blasting clubbin music. Ummm... ok... still willing to give this a shot. She gives me a clipboard with an application I was to fill out. She pointed to a bunch of chairs where others were sitting with clipboards of their own busily writing on their own applications.

After I completed my application, I busied myself with inspecting the company's choices in artwork. There were the most bizarre random things on the wall, that I had ever seen. None of the them went together. There was one such "motivational" picture of a solider with a gun that said "BRAVERY" and another painting that said "Barcelona" at the bottom.

After about 10 minutes one of the two doors leading out of the small waiting area opens and youngish looking man steps out and calls my name. Right away, I could tell this guy was a tool. And by tool I mean the fakest most phoniest person ever!

The acctual interview went great! I answered everything great and with very clear and concise responses. I think the downfall came when I opened my portfolio up and one of my DVD's that I have all my creative work on fell out and under this guys desk. He picks it up and hands it to me.

Me: Oh, you can have that if you would like.
Tool: What is it?
Me: It's a DVD I made with all my creative work on it.
Tool: (looks at me strangely) Why would I need that?
Me: (excuse me) Oh ok. Thanks. (Did he just say that?)

I realized later that after the interview that this so- called company was not for me. It was all about sales, and plus I believe that I was WAY too overqualified to even be there.

The Date

I had a date last night! It was with this guy that I had been talking online with for quite a while. I would say a little over a month. For his privacy sake I'm going to call him the Guitar Hero, because I have never in my life see anyone play guitar hero like he did.

Anyway, so we met to play pool at the local pool hall. First of all, let me just say, he looked exactly like his pictures, which is a very good thing considering he is very good looking.

We hit it off right away. We had fun playing pool, him winning, me losing. He saw that I was getting pretty frustrated playing so he decided to teach me how to play, to give me a little lesson. He was a GREAT teacher. As soon as he taught me some good tactics I was hitting them in left and right.

After we left there we were both kinda hungry so, for some reason I thought it would be a good idea to got to Taco Bell. I was good though and only ordered one taco.

We went back to his place and ate our yummy food. I seriously haven't had Taco Bell in like two years. Yummers!

That's when he showed me his mad guitar hero skills. He played almost ever song on expert, pretty near perfection. I'm such a humongous dork though,that I found this slightly attractive.

We ended up talking after that for almost an hour.

All in all. I had a great time. He's smart, talkative, very funny, very cute, a good listener, sweet and so on. I hope that I get to see him soon. I'll keep ya'll posted.

It is now time for bed!

Car Drama Part 2

So, as of today I haven't had my car for two weeks! It has been up and it has been down.

First I thought I would have to buy a new car, then quickly realized that with the salary I am making now there is no way in H-E-L-L that I would be able to afford it.

Then my friend Stephanie's new beau told me he could fix my car for a fraction of the estimate I had gotten. I was so excited! I wasn't even going to have to go into my savings for this.

Then while he was driving my brown beauty to my house on Sunday, the timing belt broke. UGH! That's a death sentence to a car basically. I literally cried in the middle of Forever 21 when I found out this news.

Ok, well Steph's beau "B" said he will take care of it, he had a mechanic friend that could fix it. That was Sunday.

Now we come to today. I still hadn't gotten any word from him about it. He finally texted me around 6 o'clock this evening saying that I will probably need a new motor. Are you KIDDING me?

Ok.. I had to edit this section. The car is getting taken car of! But I can't really go into anymore than that.... Just know that's its going to be ok now. :-)

Who remembers...

... the TV show "My So Called Life?" I nexflixed the first DVD from the series. And man, it is as good as I remembered. This is what Netflix says about it. "Along with launching the careers of star Claire Danes ( who won a Golden Globe in the series' first and only season) and Jared Leto, this teen drama series garnered a loyal cult following before its cancellation after a mere 19 episodes." Makes me wonder why they canceled it. Just a random thought. But it also made me think about other shows that were really good but canceled after only a couple seasons. Any thoughts? These are the ones I came up with...

1) Freaks and Geeks (1999)
2) Brooklyn Bridge (1991- 1993)

Car Drama

So Tuesday I go to get into my car to go to work and... it doesn't start. WTF? It was working fine yesterday. I try over and over and over... but no dice. I called my work to tell them I was going to be late. I then called my coworker, whom I'm going to call The Director from now on, to see if he could come and get me. He said "absolutely!" What a great guy. Here is a rundown of my day...

Called the place where I get my oil changed.

He recommenced at place to take my car.

Went to work for two hours.

Called the tow truck guy.

Got my car towed. :-(

Had to WALK home from the car place... took me like a half an hour. Not too bad but I had to walk on a busy street. No sidewalks... a little scary.

The Director picked me up on his lunch break so I could go back to work for a bit.

Got a phone call at work from the mechanic. Here is our conversation.

Mechanic: It's not good news.
Me: Ok.
Mechanic: I didn't even want to call you at work, I felt so bad for you.
Me: Getting really scared now. Just tell me. I'm ready.
Mechanic: Well where do I start. My eyes get really big. Well first of all...

Then she begins to tell me everything that is wrong with my poor little Honda. Now it's not a new car by any means. It is a 91 Honda Accord. But you know those cars. They run forever and a day. It was my Mom's before it was mine. I remember I was seven when she bought it brand new. So it has seen its share of ups and downs.

Anyway, I digress. She told me with parts and labor it would be $900 to fix it!!! Oh sh*t! Thats not cool. I can't afford that at all! I can't even afford $400 let alone $900. So I said I'll be over there tomorrow to pay you for the tow and the service charge for looking at it.

So, now I need a new car. My good friend from work said I could borrow her car while she is out of town this weekend and then borrow it next week as well because her fiance will be in Japan, so she was going to drive his car anyway. What a good friend! I am going to wash it for her and vacuum it out before I give it back to her next week. That is the least I can do.

As for a new car. I can't as of now afford a lot. I figured I could afford $200 a month a most. And that is really pushing it. I applied for a loan today at a credit union here in town and look at me I have a credit rating of 766!!! Wow, I'm awesome! Who knew. And I was approved for a 10k loan at 5.4% interest. I was super excited. That is really low. For a 60 month loan at 5.4% interest my payments would come out to be $201.00 a month. Not too bad but still I'm cutting my expenses really thin. I'm hoping to get a better job within the next couple of months. Or else I will be totally screwed.

As for a new car... well a new used car... I'm not sure what I'm going to get. I'm having a hard time finding exactly what I want and more importantly something I can afford. I would only like to spend 8k so I have money for TTL and put the rest into my savings. But that is proving difficult. Because everything I find for that price either is 5 or more years old or has over 80k miles on it. So that's no good.

Urggg... I'm going car shopping tomorrow with Steph! Thank God for best friends! Where would I be without them.

Ok, after a long conversation with my Mom I'm off to do my budget. Lets see what I can afford. Top 5 worst things ever....

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down

Hey all! Sorry it's been a while since I've written. I need to get better at writing more. I'm not sure why I don't. I have nothing else to do. Except find a new job. I am still looking for a new job. As I have said before I just graduated from college in May and now I am looking for a job that is more like a career. I have been at the same place for almost four years now. While they have been good to me it's time to get out of there. I did NOT pay all that money for an education to be wasted. Not that it was wasted but you know... I got a BA in Communication Arts. Everyone I tell is like "what can you do with that?" Good f-ing question! I could do anything really. I would love to work for a radio station, advertising agency, PR firm... something of that nature. My true love is film making but, I have absolutely no idea where to start with that. I could pack my bag and move to LA and leave my screenplay at every Starbucks on every corner in Hollywood but, for some reason I don't think that would work. How do film makers make it? Do they all know people, that know people? And even if I knew people would I really fit in over there? It's so brutal. I would need to grow some super thick skin. Ugh! Where do I start? How do I know what I want to do? I feel a panic attack coming on.

Ok deep breath Becky. *SIGH* While we surely did need this rain today. It is making me super tired. I came home from work, feel asleep for a half and hour, cooked dinner, feel asleep for an hour, woke up watched the Bachellorette and now I'm doing this. Watching that stupid show just makes me sad. I know it's kinda fake but seeing two people in love just made me depressed. I know I don't need a man to be happy, but when you have one in your life that you are in love with it sure does make your life better. I know he's out there somewhere... it's just a matter of time.

Anyway... enough crying. I had a really good Fourth of July with my friends. My friends John and Faith had their first annual Hinchman Olympics. We were split into four teams of four. I was on the purple team. The games consisted of individual events and team events.

The individual events were Chubby Bunny... This is Julie dominating!



Bubblegum blowing... I got last place... * tear :-(



There was also darts... which John won first place for our team



Then Phillip played around the world... last place sadly... I couldn't do any better though... basketball is hard!



As for team events there was what we liked to call drunken relay race in which one person was to chug half a beer run half way around the track hand the other half to their team member in which they were to drink the rest and so forth. Meraciously our team won that event. I however after had just eaten a very big meal and drinking many a alcoholic beverage puked after my turn. What a combonation. Hey that's what holidays are for... or so I'm told. I don't have any pictures of that event because I was little preoccupied. The other events were watermelon seed spitting, three legged race, and a scavenger hunt.... which was super fun. Here are some lovely pictures...


Watermelon seed spitting... first place yet again :-)



A cheerleader pyramid for the scavenger hunt... I love Phillips expression... priceless


Reese wearing my bandanna... she looks so cute!

One of the tasks for the scavenger hunt was a picture of your whole team jumping in the air at the same time... we succeeded! Look at all those gold medals!

Phillip climbing a tree!

Check this out... a video of the Chubby Bunny contest... highly entertaining!